The imperfections in
normalcy
点缀我日常的艺术
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Have you ever wondered why, even when you "do all the right things," you still may not be truly happy?
The Expectation
Regardless of our upbringing, culture or the country we live in, there are always expectations from others on how we are "meant to" behave, speak (or not speak), act, or look. This could come directly from the people around us, or it could be the result of a tradition, policy or rules set by many societal institutions that we are a part of.
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Similarly, this seemingly standard-looking ranunculus is usually the first preference for those who are looking to buy a flower, but only without the imperfect, tiny browning bits. Many people don't appreciate the beauty in imperfections, nor how they are actually a natural aspect of life.
The Suppression
Personally, as I was growing up and up until just recently as a woman in her mid-30s, my experiences have misguided me to not show my true feelings or express my honest thoughts. This is so, even in situations where I felt wronged and was just trying to stand up for myself. These characteristics are seen as confrontational and not what a 'good girl' does.
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Similarly, this ranunculus was sculpted to be just blooming enough, with the innermost petals just visible under the layers. When examined as a whole, this flower looks fresh and at the perfect blooming stage - everyone's favourite!
The Cost
I realised that revealing my true, authentic self can actually be a good and healthy thing to do, when practised correctly. I may not come across as nice or friendly, but expressing my true emotions and dealing with any conflict as reasonably as possible will always be better than letting negative emotions brew for months, years or decades, without addressing the underlying issues.
It is then that I can actually prevent any potentially catastrophic consequences in terms of personal or professional relationships.
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Similarly, this flower has tiny imperfections when examined up close - petals with browning edges and slightly broken petals.
The Vase
Any of the existing framework we are striving to fit ourselves into - whether cultural, institutional or societal - they are not perfect either. In fact, policies, rules or expectations are in a way, just traditions that are formed, continued and evolved across centuries, depending on each culture.
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Similarly, this hand-built vase that I made, seems normal at first glance. However, there are cracks on the inner walls, the vase is asymmetrical in shape and has imperfect glazing.
The state of normalcy is not a perfect place of rest, but rather a high-functioning equilibrium built on imperfect suppression and the endurance of small, hidden unhealed wounds.